Dear Annie: You donât need to send a card to thank someone for a gift

Dear Annie: I would like to respond to relatives who are upset when they are not thanked for giving children/teens gifts. Just tell them how you feel! When I was growing up, my grandmother was a loving but stern influence in my life and I now appreciate all the lessons she taught me. She always gifted us $20 each birthday in brand-new, crisp $1 bills that she specially requested at the bank.

I clearly remember one time when my sister and I as teenagers had gotten lazy about writing her thank-you cards. She sat us down and let us know that when someone gives you a gift, you hurt their feelings by not thanking them or sending a card. We were of course embarrassed, but it was an amazing lesson to learn.

In the 30 years since, I still go out of my way to make sure I thank gift givers because of this conversation. A text at least, or a phone call. I don’t think a written card is always necessary depending on your relationship to the giver, but it sure can’t hurt! — Teen Who Is Now a Thankful Adult

Dear Thankful: What a great letter. That is wonderful advice for the grandparents just to be honest and tell their grandchildren how they feel.

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“How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?” is out now! Annie Lane’s second anthology — featuring favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation — is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit Creators Publishing for more information. Send your questions for Annie Lane to [email protected].